Your parents are the most important people in your life. They all have done so much for you. You have been fed first, your small feet have never touched the dirtied ground, you have always been given most attention of anybody.
But, can you really call your friends your friends? Well, you can’t. It does not imply that your love for your parents is faulty or vice-versa. You see, a relationship of a parent and a child is a lot more complex than it seems like.
I have always felt up until now that parents are always trying to teach us no matter how old we get. Some are quite insightful, but some can be pretty annoying or downright wrong. Not to be hasty, they are doing this thinking that it is best for us. So, you can’t really judge them for being wrong sometimes.
And now, here in this dynamic, we can really breakdown if parents are really our friends. by citing a very recent experience in my life.
My mother and I have been very close throughout my life. I have always been quite a loner and so found a common and much needed support in her. A few days ago, she restarted her scooter lessons originally helped by my father but this time with me as the instructor. Well, it did not work out quite well. She rarely could make sense of my instructions and I tried to be as much as the patient. When I first tried to learn a scooter, I was a shaking mess so, I understood her fears.The first day bore little fruit. We tried again the second day, it was a little better but, she still didn’t follow my instructions well. I still felt that she learned a little better. But on the third day, my father went with us to instruct her. I stood on the sidelines and found her to be doing impressively well. She listened to all of dad’s instructions which were basically the same ones my dad had told me when he thought me riding.
I was amazed, to say the least. At home, when I asked her why she could not do the same things I had told her on the first and second day, the conversation I had with her made me believe that it was all related to trust.
Not a lack of trust for me or a higher trust for my more knowledgeable, more smart, more experienced dad but it was a difference in the type of trust we shared. The truth was that for my mom, she could never see me as an equal to her. For her, I was her son and so I could never truly teach her. It was not an absence of respect, it was a mountain of love for me that hindered her from learning from me. But such hindrances vanished when my dad taught her.
So for me, we can never be friends but that’s okay. We can be the best mother-son partners!